Synchronicity today again. Two weeks ago as I was in the river valley, I came across a set of keys marked, "Park set #23" which was for all the locked facilities and barricades in the Fort Sask park area. I saw who it was that might have dropped it, but they left before I could return it to them.
So, I held onto this for two weeks. Not really sure where to return them. Kept the keys in my car, regardless.
Went down to the river valley today, saw a chick on drugs walking around counting her steps and listening to music that wasn't being played. She asked me if I had a smoke, and I told her I didn't, since I was vaping.
Spent a few minutes there, decided to head back home and had the urge to pull over next to this other park a little ways away. Once I got out, I noticed a Fort Sask Parks/Recreation vehicle nearby and decided I would return the keys.
I made my way to the fellow inside the truck who was tapping away on his phone, and he cheerfully greeted me, which was strange, since I basically snuck up on him. I held the keys up and we had a conversation.
It was about his job. My job. Life. Family. Relationships. Money. Happiness. Soulmates. I stood there, leaning next to his truck for a little over a half hour discussing all these things. He told me about some of the synchronicites he's experienced, and how he too used to be in the trades but hated his job. He made it five years, and was surprised that I made it to nearly 20.
It was... special. It felt very.. meant to be, if I can describe it like that. He even commented on how it felt like we were meant to meet and that we had this instant familarity between us. We both loved reading, and when I jokingly asked if there was a 500$ reward for returning the keys; he took down my number and said, "I'll see what I can do". Offered for us to have coffee sometime, and then left.
I looked up at the sun after this and smiled. It felt like.. I'm on my way. To where, I don't know exactly, but I do know it will be exactly where I need and want to be.
In love and loved. By someone who appreciates me. Someone that I will have no doubt about their feelings towards me. And also, to a job and a home that is most suited to me. Towards a family, a dog, wealth and prosperity.
But, love mostly. I'm being moved towards love and after this conversation, money, it seems.
As Tyler told me about this phase in his life where he went from being a tradesman to working for the city; he recommended me a couple of books. Rich Dad, Poor Dad, being the #1 recommendation of his. So I ordered two of Robert Kioysaki's books on Amazon shortly after our conversation. I'm a believer, now. I believe we were meant to meet. I believe I am being guided.
Tyler and I were on the same wavelength on every topic we discussed. Nobody wants to spend fifty years of their life working at a job that pays well, but destroys the soul. Nobody wants to become a wage slave. Nobody wants to be cattle funneled along by society so that a college education, marriage, a home, a car and all such things are the natural trajectory by which we all follow.
Yes, I do want education, but on my own terms and only on the subjects I enjoy. Yes, I do want marriage, but not for the status it provides; I want to marry the woman I love. Yes, I do want a home, but not the debt that comes with it. Trapping me into having to make payments and forcing me to work harder and longer hours just to be able to afford one. Yes, I do want a car, and I have only been buying used ones. I don't need anything brand new and expensive.
Thought about Fola quite a bit this afternoon too. I still don't know where I stand with her. True Twin Flame or False? Am I the runner? Am I unfit to be with her at this moment? A part of me is saying that yes, I am unfit to be with her but another part is crying out that I am ready.
So which is it? If I am to be happy with Fola, there is a particular way I have to be before I can make peace with her. To have and build a happy life together. I thought about how she hangs out often with guys, and I've been asking myself why do I feel so threatened? It's... partly to do with how Lauren ended up kissing her guy "friend" all those years ago, and I don't want to re-experience that heartbreak again. I don't want a girlfriend who hangs out with guys all the time when she doesn't have to. When she has me.
On the other hand, I think of my new relationships with Michelle and Andee, and I realize that I can comfortably keep an opposite sex friendship going. I can keep it platonic, even though I know that both of these girls would gladly jump into bed with me if I steered it in that direction. Except I don't want to. I don't feel.. as connected with them as I do with Fola. I can't stare into their eyes for longer than a minute or so before needing to turn away. I don't have that familarity that I do with my false/true Twin Flame.
I'm still thinking about all this. Maybe she's my real Twin Flame and neither of us are ready to be together just yet. Again, though, I don't see her changing overnight. And I am still mindful of the Three of Swords. Apparently something amazing is supposed to happen soon. But what? Who? When? How?
Nobody knows but the cat down the road.
Yeah, I'll just have to ride this one out.
Last night I prayed to be lead towards the people and places that I needed to meet and be at. Today seemed like the answer to that prayer. Meeting Tyler and having the conversation we did; seems to suggest that I need to look into being more of an entrepreneur, and to work on untangling the financial situation I am in. He told me a story about a couple who was 700k in debt, and somehow they managed to eradicate all that in a few short years. It didn't make any sense, but somehow they did it. I think maybe a bankruptcy was involved at some point. It had to have been.
He told me about how he met this guy at a Tim Hortons, and they ended up having coffee and a conversation together. He told me about how Robin (the other guy) opened up a door for him, the same as he was doing for me.
The same as I was doing for him. Maybe. I think.
I guess we both opened up our doors to each other. We both spoke freely and from the heart. We both ...
We're both the same being.
He's 25. Good looking with a wife and child. Working a lower paying job instead of a higher paying one.
It felt like I was looking into the younger, idealistic version of myself. Well, more idealistic/practical.. I suppose. He at least pulled the trigger and made those changes. I have yet to do so.
I'm looking at the clock right now. Work.. I have to leave soon for work. A half hour left and I don't want to go. I just want to keep writing. I don't want to do anything but to live life and not have to listen to the banging and hammering and construction noises at my job. And feeling like a round peg trying to fit inside of a square hole.
I'm through with that. But for now, I have to hold on until the next step reveals itself.
If Fola has taught me anything of value, one of the things is to learn how to trust the universe. I see it now more clearly than ever than before I met her. It's a topic of obsession with her, and it rubbed off and now I am seeing results.
Every day continues to be a challenge. An adventure. A path that I am walking on with sights that pass by. Leading me towards somewhere special.
I feel so blessed right now for finally having my prayers answered. I can sense there is a process to all of this. There is progression. There is movement.
As much as I want to love and be loved, I still don't know who it will that I will end up with.
Yesterday, I watched this video on YouTube about distinguishing between a true Twin Flame and a false one. In the video, the lady made mention about how the heart chakra opens up whenever you are around or about to meet your Twin Flame. Or whenever you are apart. Apparently, this is a reliable way of telling if they are false or true.
Prior to meeting Fola, I had felt this intense warmth coming out of my chest. While with her, I still had periods of this now and then. And today, today I feel it again. Its a gentle radiance. Not nearly as profound as it was before Fola, but still noticeable and possibly growing stronger.
If this indicates that Fola is my true Twin Flame, then I have to be patient and work on myself. So does she. If this indicates that my true Twin Flame is around the corner, then I have to be patient and work on myself. Heh. There's not much else I can do for now.
I did something different today regarding the Tarot cards. I stacked them into three piles. One for the past, one for the present and one for the future.
Past card was Judgement. Present card was the Tower. And the future card was the Fool.
My initial impression was that of disappointment, until I looked up the interpretations.
Judgement indicated that I was living in Truth and searching for answers. That's the past, and still is the present.
The Tower indicates a period of great change about to occur.
The Fool represents innocence, spontaneity and optimism. That is the future.
Seems about right to me.
Lately I have been speaking inwardly with myself. My higher self. God. Whatever it is that is listening, and have been telling it that I am now ready for the next step.
Whatever that next step is.
I am ready.
(braces self)
