Well, maybe not the love part because that would just be gay. However, I did feel particularly sympathetic to the plight of a co-worker of mine as he recounted parts of his life to me.
First of all, being single and childless puts you in a class of your own. There's a cool sense of detachment that is present when involved in the company of married folks with kids. In both cases, envy can sometimes arise - yet, what I heard today, pushed me as far from envy as it gets.
Curtis, you see, is getting married next year. Yet, he's on the butt-end of the family dynamics at the moment. I mean, when your fiance gives you THIS for lunch:
(warning: graphic image ahead)
..It may be time to break up.
When Curtis mentioned that his fiance argued, "but you wanted me to get this!" I couldn't hold back laughing for a good couple of minutes. I mean, that is quite likely the WORST meat ever. I remember as a child being startled by this mutant meat/pasta hybrid at the grocery store. It was always this strange odditity that for some reason remained fully in stock throughout for most of my life.
I felt so bad after hearing this that I had to give my co-worker a sandwich of mine to eat instead. It was Montreal smoked meat with mustard on a soft bun. A REAL sandwich.
Then, the rest of the stories.. well, Curtis and his fiance owes around twelve grand in debt. Getting married, will cost them another twenty. She's driving around in a brand new Chevrolet Silverado while he is told to expect a "cheap" vehicle of his own once the family budget has room for it.
Sad, huh? It gets worse. He lives with his mother-in-law, who can be found up at 3am making coffee for herself for God knows what reason. Four, noisy, hyperactive kids, a stalker in the form of his sister-in-law-to-be and to top it all off, he's the only breadwinner in the family AND he makes less money than I do.
Wow.. I mean... That's admirable, but at the same time, I wonder why he hasn't killed himself by this point. What a shitty way to live. And it's not just my observation that his home life is stressing him out, but he actually comes to work to relax. His words.
So.. Single and childless.. Well, hey. Maybe things aren't so bad for me. Yet, I've taken it upon myself to re-enter the sordid world of online dating by getting my eHarmony account going.
Here are a few excerpts from the profile I posted:
Question "I typically spend my leisure time..."
Answer "My time is spent concocting grand, megalomaniacal schemes which usually involves writing, playing guitar, reading books, video games, watching movies, listening to music, pretending I can cook and brooding with my chin propped up on a knuckle. Sometimes I even go outside. I also have this weird compulsion to shop.. There's something fun about going through furniture stores and vintage shops. Last weekend I found a can of "Fish Assholes", an actual food item available at an antique store. How cool is that?"
Question "The most important thing I am looking for in a person is..."
Answer "Authenticity. No one is perfect, and it's deceptive to pretend otherwise. Also, someone who is kind and emotionally generous. A huge rack is a plus, but not necessary. =)"
Question "The last book I read and enjoyed was..."
Answer "Philip K. Dick's "We Can Remember It For You Wholesale". It's a collection of his short stories, some of which have been adapted to film. I am such a sucker for Sci-Fi.. Hankies are a must if we ever plan on watching E.T. together: "ET.. phone.. home.." Oh God, hold me. (bites lip)"
Hilarious, if I must say so myself =) I think my personality comes across effectively enough.
And here is one of the photos I'm using.
The caption says, "my megashelves of awesome (and friend)"
So far, a lady from Sherwood Park has shown interest. We'll likely be doing something tomorrow evening, which I'm not too thrilled about since it's a work week. Guess I'll have to suck it up if I'm serious about dating again.
And.. that's that. All the news thats fit to print! Life rolls on...
